breakup.

This might turn out to be an interesting post.

"The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; Blessed be the name of the Lord!" -Job 1:21

I say it all with gratitude.

In December, I sat down to think through what I hoped and dreamed would happen in 2011. I set goals, some of them more out of my control than others. I prayed through what it would look like.

One of my prayers was that I’d get the chance to date a Godly man that I respected and trusted.
In January, I got asked out by a Godly guy that I respected. Our relationship grew and for the last several months, I got to date him.

My boyfriend and I broke up yesterday. I don’t plan to publically explain what that looked like or the reasons why we didn’t stay together.

I will say, though, at the end of the day, I can’t help but thank the Lord for privilege of dating him during 2011. I never intended to date just to learn—if you know me well, you know I strive to be fully invested wherever I am. I was fully invested in this relationship and I cared very deeply about my boyfriend. Though it will look much different now that we are no longer together, I still care about him and want the very best in his life. I know he cares about me too.

I guess I post this because it, too, is part of my story. To be honest, I had a feeling as I typed up my Schlitterbahn post last week that the end of our relationship was around the corner. But I meant what I said: I wouldn’t trade it. There are things I have learned. There are ways that I am changed. It’s been refining. It’s been joyful. It’s been thrilling. It’s been hard.

And now this season is done. We didn’t date with the intention of breaking up, but nonetheless, the relationship ended that way.

I never want to be the type of woman that turns to the Lord during the good times and says thank you, but doesn’t see God moving when life’s hard. So publically, even though it is hard, I want to say, I see him moving in this loss.

He is a good, TRUSTWORTHY, father.

He is GOOD!!

He heard my prayers and he was GOOD to bring me on a journey this year of dating, and breaking up with, a Godly man. Despite the fact that it hurt a lot. Maybe because of the fact that it hurt a lot. I believe he is using that pain to grow me up in Him and bring honor to His name.

I would be a fool, heck, I would be blind, not to see Him in this too.

You will keep in perfect peace

those whose minds are steadfast,

because they trust in you.

Isaiah 26:3